After the guitar... it's the flute!

The post below sat in a "draft" status for 3+ months!  Do read the latest update in the end.

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Trust me.  This guy ROCKS at the guitar, and is gifted in his "understanding" of music.

But "flute" has been another game.  It has been hard because it takes lots of practice to form the embouchure. Yet he began doing it as he decided to be part of the school band.  

After weeks of blowing air and making a sound that resembled no particular note... Aditya just began to produce musical notes through his flute! 

He was elated and said he loves playing the flute now.  He also sheepishly admitted that earlier he was practicing the flute "just for the sake of it"!

Then he played 2 lines of a Hindi song on his own.  He then played Happy Birthday on his flute on demand!

That's the Aditya we know!  He may show no interest or energy in the beginning,  but when he does, he conquers whatever it is!

Aditya just had a performance on the school stage with the rest of the beginners' band.  This evening Aditya will begin taking classes in playing the flute.

Yet another exciting adventure begins!  

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Update:
Aditya has been taking flute lessons for 3 months.  His flute playing skills have improved dramatically.  (To my ears,  it sounds perfect:) 
His band teacher is very happy. 
Yet another example of what an amazing student he is,  in anything he undertakes! 
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What does this mean?

The fact is, we all are amazing students, in everything we set our eyes on.  But maybe sometimes we forget to set our eyes on things that matter.  It is like forgetting to enter your destination in your GPS! 

I am not saying this.  Aditya is. Through his actions!

--Baba

Things we take for granted!

The list never ceases to grow.

New in 2015:
1.  Playing with other kids is really no big deal now.  During recess/playground time he is commonly found playing "hot lava monster"/"wall-ball" with other kids in his class.
2.  We watched the entire Cricket world cup 2015 together ("Dream come true").  Our hearts filled with joy as he would yell "Out!  Out!"  when a batsman of an opposing team got out.  He fully understood and appreciated the rules (e.g. power play), the strategies (e.g. save your wickets for the end), and the joy that comes from rooting from your country (India) against your arch-rivals (Pakistan/Australia)
3. Loves to play cricket with Baba.   Did I already mention:  'Dream come true"?
4. The twins routinely spend time together doing "kid" things like playing scrabble, or painting rocks.  Sister is super-happy!
5. Tried out "wall climbing" at a nearby park.  Maintained a great attitude even as it was hard in the beginning.  Any time we go back to this park now,  Aditya is sure to go wall climbing!
6. Takes the lead in helping around the house!  No complaints, young man:)

Each and every one of those is a huge accomplishment. 

We are immensely grateful for each of them, and are fully aware that we could not take these for granted only years ago.

And now a question for you... what are the things you take for granted?  Think of the times you had to work hard for those?  Take a moment and enjoy this moment, then go work on adding to the list of things you can take for granted.  

That is exactly what Aditya has been doing for us over here.  And if he can do it, so can you and I!

--Baba

Confident team player and a wonderful student ...take that, autism!

I have been meaning to upload some of Aditya's school presentations for the past two years. Being a hands-on school, the kids have a lot of opportunities to get up in front of the class and present their research. Third grade presents a bigger challenge in that students work in small groups, collaborating on different aspects of the project.
Aditya's class researched the Ohlone Indians as part of their social studies. Aditya's group, in particular, focused on Shelter and clothing. I will let pictures do the rest of the talking!

This is the first page of his assignment. Below is the grading page with his teacher's remarks after the presentation:

Aditya and friends

This weekend, we went to "The Family Skate Night" event of the Y-guides program both kids are part of. There I met another mom from Aditya's class. As soon as we were done exchanging pleasantries, she said,"Aditya and D (her daughter) have become good friends! I am so happy! He is such an awesome kid!" 

He now has a best friend in his class. The two boys look out for each other and stick together through lunch and recess. This friendship has blossomed since the beginning of the school year and other kids now know not to mess around either with A or his friend N. But unlike past years, Aditya being friends with N does not mean that they play exclusively with each other. In fact, they both play basketball, wall ball and other playground games with boys from their class and his previous years' classes. They also are part of... shhhh .. a girls monkey-bars club :)

Of late, Aditya has started paying particular attention to his looks. He spends quite a bit of time combing his hair each morning. It is so CUTE :) He also tries hard to spike his hair into a mohawk :) One day he tried hard to oil his hair and make a mohawk like his friend N. He was brimming after school, that N actually thought his mohawk looked cool :) 

I am also noticing extra sweet behavior, more willingness and proactive help around the house. Last week, I had to leave in the middle of unloading the dishwasher. When I returned 5 minutes later, it was taken care of. Aditya just noticed how busy I was and took care of the dishwasher. Simple things like this bring tears of joy .. Ah, the pleasures of mothering this boy ... 

Last week, the kids had a Choir and Band performance. Shreya was in the choir and Aditya played the flute in the Band. He confessed today that initially he practiced the flute because he had to and couldn't do it very well. But now he is really enjoying it. And now that he is enjoying it, he is actually doing a lot better in producing notes.  

Another huge update is about a girl C in his class that he does not really get along well with.  There have been incidents between C and him over the last 2-3 years where C apparently does not talk to him nicely.  After talking it out to us over the last few weeks, he finally talked about this to his teacher (in the presence of Baba).  The teacher did some reflective listening, and encouraged him to talk to C in the teacher's presence.  She told Aditya to specifically request C what action he wanted her to take e.g. be respectful of him when they worked together.  Baba then left the scene.  C was called to talk to Aditya and the teacher.  Later we learned from the teacher that Aditya spoke directly to C and did the needful.  What a great skill this is for any one,  why just a kid!  

We also learned later that C had had the same issue with another child,  but that other child had chosen not to talk to C about it.  

After this meeting Aditya has been reporting a generally better time dealing with C. 

San Diego, Thanksgiving 2014!

When we last visited San Diego in 2008  it was after our school district denied Aditya services like ABA, Speech Therapy, Occupational Therapy.

It felt unfair at that time.  In San Diego we could see an Aditya who was trying to enjoy himself,  but oftentimes finding it hard to even survive this chaotic world with places like the Sea World and the zoo. 

Aditya and family went back to San Diego during the thanks giving break of 2014.

And what a turn around that was!

Two other families from our school joined us at the San Diego Safari park.  The next day, they joined us at Sea World.  And Aditya not just survived it all, he loved it.

Did you read that? 

HE LOVED and CRAVED FOR the company of similar age kids from his school. And for mom, the cherry on top was that they were both BOYS!

Here are some examples.
1. Not a fan of going on rides,  but tried the scary sounding "Manta" ride.  Reported that he did not like it, but did not make a big deal about it.

2. "I do not want to do that ride on my own, I will wait for my friends."  said A when other kids were at the restroom. And it was not because he did not want to go on the ride, he just wanted to do it with his friends! :)  This was a first!!

3. Wrote journal entries about his trip! One morning, we found him bent over a notebook and he told me that he was enjoying the trip so much, that he didn't want to forget it, so he was journaling his memories :)

4. Loved the idea when he heard the two families decided to come to our hotel room
5. WRESTLED with the other boys at our hotel room!  He had no chance,  but in our eyes he won as soon as decided to compete:)
6. Took turns singing during a mini variety show at the hotel room.


It was not as if there were no challenges though.  Aditya used to love rides when we went in 2008.  This time around,  he showed no love for rides.  Also after Manta the ride that he took but didn't like, he became anxious about going on any ride at all.  So much so that he suspected the helicopter simulation (which feels like you are on board a helicopter,  with seats vibrating and he screen showing scenes of a snowy ride) to be a real take-off.  Right before the ride was to begin, he wanted to leave.  Once we told him that was too late, he decided to stay but was anxious.  In the end, he was worried we had flown out of San Diego.

On the other hand it was easy to reason with him.  (Easy compared to when we were beginning our Son Rise journey with him.)

Reminding him of a time when he had been behind a steering wheel in a car racing video game at a birthday party, Baba asked him to think of the Helicopter simulation as a video game,  except someone else is driving the car.  He seemed to be at peace when he got this.  We then also showed him another ride visible from the window of that Helicopter simulation room.  Later when we went out we also pointed inwards saying,  "that is where we were the whole time during the helicopter simulation".

Apart from this one experience, he did sensational at the park.

We are saving the best part for the end of this post.

On the way back we all listened to a "Penderwicks" audio book.  Aditya has been receptive to reading and hearing fiction books but was mostly hooked on to Gerronimo Stilton.
With Penderwicks,  he showed an interest in literature a lot more his age.


Shreya (sister) later privately reported to Baba that she enjoyed the fact that Aditya actually talked to her about "normal" things in the car!


After the trip, he chose to borrow another book from the "Penderwicks" series on his own!

It's thanksgiving season!  And we are thankful to our kids yet again for being part of our life and sharing this beautiful journey with us.

Another dream just came true!

This is Baba... Aditya's dad.  I volunteer in his class on Friday afternoons.
 
Two Fridays ago (when I first wrote this draft it was "last Friday")...

As usual I parked the car outside the school and began walking towards his class.  It was a few minutes before the end of the lunch recess.

Suddenly, I saw something.  Right before my eyes, another dear dream of mine was coming true.

I had dreamed about this for years, but had almost forgotten it.

Yes, yes, he has fulfilled not one, not two, but several of my "Daddy" dreams.  Be it playing cricket together,  joining each other in twisting tunes (i.e. singing one song on the tune of another),  playing the guitars together, and so on.

Yet, this one dream had seemed so distant it almost felt impossible until only a few weeks ago.

What did I see?

He was playing basketball with three other boys!  On his own!  Without any coaxing or coaching.  Or shall we say... because there was no coaxing and coaching?

Is that why you were not doing it, Aditya?  That you felt as if we were trying to push you to do it?

One day,  he will read this blog post.  I will wait until that day to know the answer.  I don't want to coax him for an answer right now:)

In the meantime, Aditya is dribbling the ball.  He goes closer to the hoop.  No one stops him.  This is not a game.  Then, he takes a shot at the hoop.  The ball makes it into the hoop!

When movies are being edited,  I hear it takes them several tries to get everything just right.

But... dreams are not movies.  How did Aditya shoot the hoop right when I was seeing it?

Thank you, my friend!  You continue to give me amazing beautiful experiences that cannot be explained,  that need not be explained!

--Baba

News since beginning Third Grade!

Aditya entered Third grade in August 2014. This is his fourth year in the same school,  third year going full time! (For the record, he has never had an IEP / 504 plan or any support, other than the reduced day schedule in Kindergarten)

In the 2.5 months so far,  he has
1. gone on an overnight camping beach trip (3 days and 2 nights) with kids in his class (plus a few parent chaperons, including his own mom)
2. continued to maintain a reputation for being a great kid from the class parents (it is a parent participation school) as well as his new teacher Chris
3. loosened up remarkably compared to the last two years at the same school
4. made friends with a like minded (nice, gentle, appropriate)  boy 
5. liked by several kids, especially girls who like to be around this gentle young man than some of the more rambunctious ones.
6. made his own Halloween costume (Samsung Galaxy 4)
7. collected 57 pieces of candy on Halloween going out with sister and Baba
8. tapped on a 20 some year old girl's shoulders at Whole Foods to ask if she is in line for the Burrito Bowl,  and when the girl asked, "yeah and how was your Halloween? Did you eat all your candy?" simply said, "No I don't eat any" without going into why
9. started learning the guitar, and is currently amazing his teacher by playing things he has learned on his own

But here is the most amazing feat so far.
Yesterday he said, "My teacher really likes me."
Aai asked, "how do you know?"
"From her body language", he replied :)

PRICELESS!