Aditya's amazing social strides from a weekend ago. (Not the weekend that ended yesterday. The one before.)
1. There was some police activity going on. Helicopters roaming around making announcements such as "Stay inside because we are trying to look for a man who is on the run". Our family of four had just begun going for a bicycle ride at this time. We decided to turn around, come home, and look on the Internet for what was happening around us. (We have NO TV:-)
No tantrums from Aditya. Complete willingness to turn around without knowing much about "why exactly are we going back home so soon"... but knowing enough from our looks and our body language that something was wrong!
Wow!
While Baba looked up the news on the Internet, Aai explained what was going on to the twins.
Usually anxious about anything related to "police", Aditya decided not to hide inside the house but stay outside on the porch and even announce that he would be guarding the bikes!
2. After confirming nothing untoward was happening, we did go bicycling to the nearby park, but there was a huge crowd over there, and possibly some family re-union happening too. We asked the twins if they wanted to stay there or they were okay with a change of venue- another park half a mile away. Both were totally okay to stop what they had begun doing and instead come along with us!
3. At the other park... the biggest and sweetest surprise was waiting to happen! There was a couple of little girls playing there. Aditya told us he was going to go there and join the ongoing game because "that was a cool thing to do in stage 5".
So we decided to stay where we were... but watch him. Shreya was (luckily) playing with something else. Aditya began by going close to the girls and looking at one of the girls full-on, and asking a direct question. However the question "felt" like "small-talk" from the looks of it. Pretty soon he had learned the name of the girl and that the other girl was her younger sister. Shreya joined them soon, and the four were soon playing a totally newly spun game of some sort. They also told us happily that they were all going to different grades. The younger sister to kindergarten, Aditya was going to first grade, Shreya second grade, and the older sister was in third grade!
4. Then as we said it was time to leave... Aditya practically set up his own play date with the older girl. Actually, this girl was really interested in knowing when we will come again. She was going to be there the next morning. Aditya replied, "That is too early for us but we will see you SOME OTHER TIME" (He knew that he would be with his grown up SON-RISE friends the next morning.)
4. Back home. We were making a smoothie (milk shake). Aditya showed up and announced, "I am first in line... no cutting!"
And we can no longer rub our eyes and say, "Is this a dream?"
Monday, October 22, 2012
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Math, oh Math!
I was aiding in the classroom today and had stepped out for a minutes to help a little girl. As I walked back in, I saw these 3 boys (Aditya being one of them) furiously working on something.
Here is what had happened earlier:
Aditya had no unfinished work while most of his classmates were ploughing through piles of it. So his teacher asked him if he wanted to try the next level of the problem of the month, he had already level A of the problem earlier. He was ready, along with a couple of second graders!
As I went closer, I heard Aditya's table partner telling him how hard it was and how only a few second graders could do it, and Aditya is, in fact, a first grader. Aditya told him that he would still try and ask for help if he found it tough. The next thing I know, after about 5 minutes, Aditya was looking around the room, table cleared. As I approached him, he got up from his seat and whispered in my ear,"I am done with part B. But I will get the actual problem sheet only tomorrow. Then I will make a clear illustration and tell everybody that I found the answer. Till then don't tell anybody, please! Not even my teacher!"
Here is the Level B problem:
The Wheel Shop sells other kinds of vehicles. There are bicycles and go-carts in a different room of the shop. Each bicycle has only one seat and each go-cart has only one seat. There are a total of 21 seats and 54 wheels in that room.
How many are bicycles and how many are go-carts?
http://www.noycefdn.org/documents/math/POM/pom-wheelshop.pdf
I asked him if he had understood what the problem was and how come he found the answer so quick. "I just worked it out. It is fifteen and six."
I can bet that I would have taken longer to do this, even at the end of elementary school!
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Thank God it's...
It's bed time on Thursday, and we are brushing teeth.
Aditya: "I am so glad tomorrow is the last day of conferences"
Baba: "Really! How come?"
Aditya: "Because when there are (parent teacher) conferences school ends at 1pm. Then there is no creative ex."
Baba: "Wow... so you mean you are missing Creative Ex?"
Aditya: "Yeah!"
Baba: "Wow... this is amazing. Sounds like the third slot is what you like the most."
Aditya: "Yes!"
Baba: "But that wasn't so last year right?"
Aditya: "Yeah. Last year's creative ex was different. I didn't like it."
Baba: "Well I am really excited and happy for you that you are liking it this year!"
Why is this a big deal? (AND IT IS A BIG DEAL FOR US.)
"Creative Ex" last year (in kindergarten) was a totally unstructured (read chaotic) activity which Aditya had a challenge with. He was having to deal with the collective energy of all those little kids, and not knowing what to do while everybody seemed to be fine just "exploring something creative to do" with supplies (e.g. cardboard, beads, etc) provided by the teacher and/or aide.
So when he said he cannot wait until he gets to do creative ex again next week... I was OVERJOYED!
Something magical is going on here. His brain is actually undergoing a change! Or maybe all kids with autism have the ability to do this... we as the parents just had to let him do it:-)
Aditya: "I am so glad tomorrow is the last day of conferences"
Baba: "Really! How come?"
Aditya: "Because when there are (parent teacher) conferences school ends at 1pm. Then there is no creative ex."
Baba: "Wow... so you mean you are missing Creative Ex?"
Aditya: "Yeah!"
Baba: "Wow... this is amazing. Sounds like the third slot is what you like the most."
Aditya: "Yes!"
Baba: "But that wasn't so last year right?"
Aditya: "Yeah. Last year's creative ex was different. I didn't like it."
Baba: "Well I am really excited and happy for you that you are liking it this year!"
Why is this a big deal? (AND IT IS A BIG DEAL FOR US.)
"Creative Ex" last year (in kindergarten) was a totally unstructured (read chaotic) activity which Aditya had a challenge with. He was having to deal with the collective energy of all those little kids, and not knowing what to do while everybody seemed to be fine just "exploring something creative to do" with supplies (e.g. cardboard, beads, etc) provided by the teacher and/or aide.
So when he said he cannot wait until he gets to do creative ex again next week... I was OVERJOYED!
Something magical is going on here. His brain is actually undergoing a change! Or maybe all kids with autism have the ability to do this... we as the parents just had to let him do it:-)
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Introspection .. Aditya's and mine
Yesterday, Aditya had the first ever playdate with a boy from his class. This is the first time he has asked to have a classmate over. We had been waiting for this day since he started Kindergarten last year but had decided to give him his time to WANT this. We had other Son-Rise peer playdates which I arranged with boys outside his class. Last year, he never felt like inviting any child from his class. Last week, as we were talking about kids in his science group, he said that he liked AK, as he was quiet and nice. I wondered aloud if AK would be a good friend. Aditya then said that he would like to have a playdate with him to test it!
On Monday, he actually went up to this boy and asked him if he would like to come to our house for a PD!
When we got home, he told me, "Aai, now do not make us play the cube game, I have now had so many playdates, I know what to do! Can we choose what to play?" (I had made a big dice out of a box, with zip-lock bags taped to the sides. I changed up the games the kids would play on each PD. We had a mix of physical play, board games and pretend play, unstructured yet structured)
Yesterday after school, I picked up Aditya and AK, Shreya and her own playdate. The girls were talking to each other, giggling and having fun. Aditya was talking to me about what he would do when AK came home and how they would have lots of fun, while AK was walking behind us. After a while, I said to Aditya, "I am excited for you! But what about now?"
Aditya: "I am having fun now too!"
I: "I am not sure if your friend is having fun, though. He seems to be bored."
At that, a light bulb seemed to go on in Aditya's head. It seemed to me that he had not realized that the playdate starts right from the moment I pick them up, not after we reach home! Then he started telling AK about the different Beyblades he has and they went on to have a lively discussion about Beyblades and then moving on to some other topics.
At home, they dived into the playroom and started playing Beyblades, followed by Marbles and Monopoly. About 1.5 hours later, as they came out for a snack, I noticed that Aditya had a flat affect and seemed distant and removed. The playdate continued for 30 more minutes where they played Jenga.
After AK left, I asked Aditya how the playdate went for him.
"Good."
"I noticed that you were very enthusiastic at the beginning but did not seem so toward the end. How come?"
"I don't really know, I think I got tired."
I tried asking him a couple different ways to try figure out what could have gone wrong. Later, I asked him to describe one challenge he faced while he played today. And BANG came the reply:
"I had a challenge when we played Monopoly. AK knew how to play it, but his rules were different than ours. I tried to tell him what the rules were, but he kept saying that he knew the rules. I even showed him the instructions that came with it, but he didn't take a look at them."
"Is that why you said you were bored?"
"Yes. And could you please help me with this challenge in Son-Rise? I had a hard time after that!"
"Sure, we will, Aditya!"
Wow! This boy knows exactly what his challenge is and that he wants help with it. He is taking charge of it and wants to find a way out!
Today he went on a field trip without me for the time ever. He went with another parent in their car, carrying his own booster seat.
I freaked out as I caught sight of him on the playground today! I would have never imagined him on parallel bar! He didn't dare go close to any bars this time last year. Today he was resting on the parallel bars after running around chasing somebody!
He coolly replied to my questions that he began doing this sometime in late September. Till a month ago, he would come running to hug me when he saw me at lunch. Not today. He said "Hi, Aai!" from a distance followed by "I see D. Bye!" and went off to chase D.
Sigh! I miss my little boy! But wasn't this the day I had waited for so long! Hmm ..time to find something else to do?
On Monday, he actually went up to this boy and asked him if he would like to come to our house for a PD!
When we got home, he told me, "Aai, now do not make us play the cube game, I have now had so many playdates, I know what to do! Can we choose what to play?" (I had made a big dice out of a box, with zip-lock bags taped to the sides. I changed up the games the kids would play on each PD. We had a mix of physical play, board games and pretend play, unstructured yet structured)
Yesterday after school, I picked up Aditya and AK, Shreya and her own playdate. The girls were talking to each other, giggling and having fun. Aditya was talking to me about what he would do when AK came home and how they would have lots of fun, while AK was walking behind us. After a while, I said to Aditya, "I am excited for you! But what about now?"
Aditya: "I am having fun now too!"
I: "I am not sure if your friend is having fun, though. He seems to be bored."
At that, a light bulb seemed to go on in Aditya's head. It seemed to me that he had not realized that the playdate starts right from the moment I pick them up, not after we reach home! Then he started telling AK about the different Beyblades he has and they went on to have a lively discussion about Beyblades and then moving on to some other topics.
At home, they dived into the playroom and started playing Beyblades, followed by Marbles and Monopoly. About 1.5 hours later, as they came out for a snack, I noticed that Aditya had a flat affect and seemed distant and removed. The playdate continued for 30 more minutes where they played Jenga.
After AK left, I asked Aditya how the playdate went for him.
"Good."
"I noticed that you were very enthusiastic at the beginning but did not seem so toward the end. How come?"
"I don't really know, I think I got tired."
I tried asking him a couple different ways to try figure out what could have gone wrong. Later, I asked him to describe one challenge he faced while he played today. And BANG came the reply:
"I had a challenge when we played Monopoly. AK knew how to play it, but his rules were different than ours. I tried to tell him what the rules were, but he kept saying that he knew the rules. I even showed him the instructions that came with it, but he didn't take a look at them."
"Is that why you said you were bored?"
"Yes. And could you please help me with this challenge in Son-Rise? I had a hard time after that!"
"Sure, we will, Aditya!"
Wow! This boy knows exactly what his challenge is and that he wants help with it. He is taking charge of it and wants to find a way out!
Today he went on a field trip without me for the time ever. He went with another parent in their car, carrying his own booster seat.
I freaked out as I caught sight of him on the playground today! I would have never imagined him on parallel bar! He didn't dare go close to any bars this time last year. Today he was resting on the parallel bars after running around chasing somebody!
He coolly replied to my questions that he began doing this sometime in late September. Till a month ago, he would come running to hug me when he saw me at lunch. Not today. He said "Hi, Aai!" from a distance followed by "I see D. Bye!" and went off to chase D.
Sigh! I miss my little boy! But wasn't this the day I had waited for so long! Hmm ..time to find something else to do?
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
He has begun to play with kids at school!
We are so excited! Almost 40 days into his school year, Aditya is not just going to school, he is totally present at school, taking it all in, as well as CONTRIBUTING!
This morning he came to us and began the day by announcing the different kinds of "stretches" he has learnt about at PE. Forward lunges, sit ups, cherry picking, you name it! And he was fully interactive, asking us.... do you know what "cherry picking" is... then showing it to us! Oh... what a way to begin the day!
We remember that less than a year ago he would begin the day by "talking" extensively... but that talking was on his own terms about his interests like various items in a restaurant's take away menu... or different kinds of brass instruments and their countries of origins :)
Within 10 minutes, he had moved on to asking what different punctuation and quotation marks we knew, describing "juicy" words and "regular" words in English, and commented that "regular" was not a "juicy word". Him playing with words is no longer news here. He comes up with a few "jokes" by twisting words and playing with two languages (English and Marathi) regularly. We are SO grateful for this! How hard he has worked to come so far from the diagnosis of cognitive and speech delay!
One more HUGE update. (The title of this post is a give-away though!)
He played a pretend play game with two girls-- one from his class and one not! They formed a game on the fly where they were birds going out to get food and Aditya was guarding the nest. Apparently, they agreed to play the game again the next day.
However, when he approached her the next day to carry on the same game, she told him that she could not. He seemed a little upset when he narrated this to me, but said that he would try the next day again. The next day, instead of playing with her, he went and played something else with a couple of boys in his class! He went and stood there, and they gave him a role: he was the referee in a game of Foursquare !
And then today, he played Frisbee with a few more boys. When he was "playing with" them, he did not seem to figure out everything that was going on. BUT HE TRIED, and he continued to do it. At one point, he threw the Frisbee to catch all by himself but could not make it in time before the Frisbee would land. Another boy picked it up, and threw it back to him!
Games are played, defined, re-defined on the playground exactly like that. What's really great about Aditya doing it is... the kids seem to accept him in the "tribe"! They seem to respond to him doing his bit!
Something I found really funny was a conversation between him and his sister regarding a girl from his Kinder class, who broke her arm last weekend. They talked about how and where they got "the news" and then about the girl who actually told Aditya this. They were giggling, joking and gossiping about other kids and the happenings around them like there was no end! Seriously, does this child even know that he was not supposed to be taking such an interest in other people and their lives? (Hey buddy, you have autism! :)
Oh, and one last thing... which is really the best thing.
When he comes home these days, he has that mischievous and victorious look on his face. "I have a news" he announces, and then tells us which kids he played with today. He is sure to follow with the question, "Do you think that was STAGE 5"?
"That was not just stage 5, Aditya, that was being a terrific friend!" we reply!
PS: We do Son-Rise after school and on the weekends, with regular feedback, training and team meetings ... we are not yet done, we will continue till he overcomes all his challenges. Autism, here we come!
This morning he came to us and began the day by announcing the different kinds of "stretches" he has learnt about at PE. Forward lunges, sit ups, cherry picking, you name it! And he was fully interactive, asking us.... do you know what "cherry picking" is... then showing it to us! Oh... what a way to begin the day!
We remember that less than a year ago he would begin the day by "talking" extensively... but that talking was on his own terms about his interests like various items in a restaurant's take away menu... or different kinds of brass instruments and their countries of origins :)
Within 10 minutes, he had moved on to asking what different punctuation and quotation marks we knew, describing "juicy" words and "regular" words in English, and commented that "regular" was not a "juicy word". Him playing with words is no longer news here. He comes up with a few "jokes" by twisting words and playing with two languages (English and Marathi) regularly. We are SO grateful for this! How hard he has worked to come so far from the diagnosis of cognitive and speech delay!
One more HUGE update. (The title of this post is a give-away though!)
He played a pretend play game with two girls-- one from his class and one not! They formed a game on the fly where they were birds going out to get food and Aditya was guarding the nest. Apparently, they agreed to play the game again the next day.
However, when he approached her the next day to carry on the same game, she told him that she could not. He seemed a little upset when he narrated this to me, but said that he would try the next day again. The next day, instead of playing with her, he went and played something else with a couple of boys in his class! He went and stood there, and they gave him a role: he was the referee in a game of Foursquare !
And then today, he played Frisbee with a few more boys. When he was "playing with" them, he did not seem to figure out everything that was going on. BUT HE TRIED, and he continued to do it. At one point, he threw the Frisbee to catch all by himself but could not make it in time before the Frisbee would land. Another boy picked it up, and threw it back to him!
Games are played, defined, re-defined on the playground exactly like that. What's really great about Aditya doing it is... the kids seem to accept him in the "tribe"! They seem to respond to him doing his bit!
Something I found really funny was a conversation between him and his sister regarding a girl from his Kinder class, who broke her arm last weekend. They talked about how and where they got "the news" and then about the girl who actually told Aditya this. They were giggling, joking and gossiping about other kids and the happenings around them like there was no end! Seriously, does this child even know that he was not supposed to be taking such an interest in other people and their lives? (Hey buddy, you have autism! :)
Oh, and one last thing... which is really the best thing.
When he comes home these days, he has that mischievous and victorious look on his face. "I have a news" he announces, and then tells us which kids he played with today. He is sure to follow with the question, "Do you think that was STAGE 5"?
"That was not just stage 5, Aditya, that was being a terrific friend!" we reply!
PS: We do Son-Rise after school and on the weekends, with regular feedback, training and team meetings ... we are not yet done, we will continue till he overcomes all his challenges. Autism, here we come!
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