"Puppies" for Dummies!

I Son-Rised today with Aditya over lunch which extended for about an hour and 15 minutes. There was not much we could do besides this animated discussion, but boy... what a discussion!

Here is a SMALL portion of it which I have tried to remember:
(Aditya's speech is identified with ALL UPPERCASE.)

"DO YOU LOVE ME YOU THINK SO OR YOU DON'T THINK SO?"

"I think so!"

"WHAT DO YOU NOT LOVE?"

"Spiders, trash, paper cups, plastic bags"
(The astute reader will recognize that these are things we put away in trash... don't freak out... we do recycle... but for him it's trash or similar to trash... so I want to be consistent and call all that is to be thrown away as things I don't love! I am hoping he is also getting the message: what or who I love will never go to the trash can)

"AND WHAT DO YOU NOT LOVE?"

"Used batteries, broken things, broken vacuum cleaner"

"AND?"

"Broken wireless routers and broken mattresses" I surrender as I remember about these favourite topics of discussion!

Aditya says BINGO! in his mind and puts on the hat of an FBI agent!

We discuss why the wires in the wireless router got broken and when will the wires in the wireless router that we presently use be broken. I do my best to provide a satisfactory and truthful answer. In the process I do ask him when will be the next time the glass of water on the table will topple. He says it won't topple. I say similarly the wireless router won't be broken.

Probably not convinced, he continues:

"WHICH MATTRESS DID YOU PUT IN IN THE DUMPSTER?"

I try to be as truthful as possible:
"The king size mattress from Murasaki Futons"

"WHY DID YOU THROW IT AWAY?'

"Because it had grown old"

"AND?"

"It had lots of folds"

"WHAT, BLISTERS?" (He probably hears FOAD which is Marathi means blisters.)

"No, folds"

"AND?"

"So I could not sleep in it

"AND?"

"And it could not be fixed"

"WHY IT COULD NOT BE FIXED"

I depart from the truth at this point, but have to make a U turn pretty soon, as explained below!
"I actually spoke to the guy in Murasaki Futons and said there are folds in the mattress, can you fix them?"

"WHAT DID HE SAY?"

"He said he can't fix it."

"IT'S BROKEN SO YOU RETURN IT TO THE STORE" pat comes the reply as he was told this the last time we returned something to a store.

"Yes we return it if it's new when it's broken. But the mattress was ooooold so they would not take it back!"

"WHY DID YOU RETURN THE TABLE TO WALMART?" Aditya points my attention to the fact that I also returned a corner table to Walmart a couple of days ago, even when it was not broken.

"Oh that table was too small so I got a big center table instead and returned the small table to Walmart"

"DO YOU LIKE THE BIG CENTER TABLE?"

"Yes!!"

"WHY DO YOU LIKE THE BIG CENTER TABLE?"

"Because I can put lots of stuff on it like cups of tea and snacks when people visit us."

"WILL YOU RETURN ME"

"No I won't return you"

"WHY YOU WON'T RETURN ME"

"I don't like to return my friends and my children." (Right, I want to say he is first and foremost my friend! )

"DO YOU LOVE ME?"

"Yes!"

"WHEN YOU WILL PUT ME IN THE TRASH CAN?"

"Never!"

"WHAT DO YOU PUT IN THE TRASH CAN?"

"Trash"

"AND DISPOSABLE THINGS?"

"Yes!"

"AM I DISPOSABLE?"

"No Aditya, only paper plates and cups.."

"AND PAPER SPOONS..."

"Yeah, and plastic spoons..."

"AND PLASTIC KNIVES..."

"Yes, and plastic knives!"

"NOT METAL CUPS AND SPOONS and KNIVES"

"Not metal cups and spoons and knives"

"AND NOT TOYS"

"And not children, not cats and dogs" ... at this point I hasten to make it clear I don't have any of those intentions!

"YEAH THEY ARE BIGGER THAN THE TRASH CAN" says he as he smiles!

"That's right Aditya, you are a smart boy!" I smile in return as I am glad he is convinced he is bigger than some things like the potty so he won't fall in. (He used to worry about this)

Just as I am thinking this, comes the question:
"AND PUPPIES?"

"No, we don't put puppies in the trash can"

"HOW DO I MAKE A PRUNE CAN I SHOW YOU"

(Yes, a new topic!)

"Yeah, tell me about it Aditya!"

"FIRST YOU TAKE A PLUM, YOU PUT IT IN THE SUN. IT BECOMES SMALL AND DRY, THEN YOU EAT IT."

His face lights up as he concludes his favorite recipe... recipes are cool... they NEVER change:)

"Yeah... and do you know what happens if you put a dog in the sun?" I ask a question almost as if a mad dog had bit me... seriously... I don't remember how I ended up asking this question right after the prune recipe!

"A PUPPY!"

"Yeah..... that's a good joke.....!!!!" I cannot stop laughing as I also marvel at the way he perceives the world!